Hot Take: Is Too Much Self-Care (and Self-Obsession) Keeping You Single?

Hey girl, let’s get real for a minute.

We love self-care. Journals, affirmations, bubble baths, aesthetic mornings, it’s all part of the glow. But here’s the tea: when self-love turns into self-obsession, it can actually be keeping you single.

Yes, self-love is powerful. Yes, it’s necessary. But if all you do is focus on your own glow, your own rituals, your own growth, you might be unintentionally blocking connection, love, and meaningful friendships.

The Soft Truth

Self-care is amazing but life isn’t meant to be lived in a bubble.
If you’re constantly saying:

• “I need to focus on me first”

• “I’m not ready for anyone”

• “I don’t need a man or a relationship to thrive”

…then girl, I see you. That mindset is powerful and healthy in many ways. But here’s the catch: if you secretly do want love or connection, this “all about me” focus can actually be a wall you’ve built around yourself.

The right people don’t magically appear while you’re only nurturing your own life. Love, friendship, and connection require action, showing up, giving chances, and yes, a little vulnerability.

The Culture Problem

Modern wellness culture has made self-focus glamorous. Social media celebrates:

✨ “I love me”
✨ “I’m thriving solo”
✨ “Single and glowing”

And yes, independence is beautiful. But when self-care becomes self-obsession, it can:

• Make you avoid conversations or opportunities

• Keep you stuck in your comfort zone

• Cause you to silently filter out potential connections because “they’re not perfect”

Here’s the hot take: love doesn’t arrive in your aura just because you’re glowing. You have to let it in.

The Glow-Up Shift

Here’s how to balance self-love and connection:

1. Keep your self-care routine — it’s sacred.

2. But don’t let it become a shield that stops you from saying hi, giving someone a chance, or showing up for love.

3. Be willing to meet people halfway — yes, even if they’re imperfect.

4. Know your worth, but don’t use it as an excuse to avoid effort.

Funny note: if it’s clear they’re not worth your time? Girl, leave. Stop wasting your sparkle. Life’s too short.

The glow comes from balance, loving yourself AND showing up fully in the world. Let love, friendship, and connection meet you halfway. Put yourself out there. Take a risk. Say yes.

Because true glow isn’t just about you. It’s about you in the world, creating life, love, and connection that actually lasts.

With love, honesty, and soft girl courage,

Ritisha
Wellness Glow Club ✨